Especially when you lose the battle. My family knows the pain of that. A lot of families do.
I heard about a loss to cancer today and I felt sad. Shocked me really. I didn’t even know him, never met him. But his potential … what was left to give that saddened me. Another unfinished life.
I heard he was 43. Colon cancer. Chadwick Boseman.
But he still made an impact. Publicly through his works and privately through activism.
He’d made many works but his most notable … Black Panther. I love that role, it changed some people’s views of what a superhero could look like, Wakanda forever right? Changing perspectives with his work.
But my favorites were Marshall and 42. Playing historical figures is a mighty responsibility especially when their significance weighs heavily. I enjoyed the portrayals and internal struggles. The storytelling mattered. You got the whole picture, the strength and vulnerability in character.
So in honor of his memory I’m pausing Feel Good 5 Friday to remember a guy who made impactful stories. He was more than just an actor I know, but these are stories he participated in, extensions of values and beliefs rooted within. He was introduced to me this way. Friday Four, if you get a chance, check some of these out.
Needing to escape the funk and keeping my vision board promise to myself I filled up the gas tank, packed the car, and went off on a RainMan road trip adventure with the kids.
Never been there before, but it was on the list, see this majestic being. And I stood there and soaked it in. From all angles I took my time to just sit there and appreciate it.
The Great Outdoors
The air. We just took a little extra that day and it filled me with peace.
But I guess a lot of people were looking for the same kind of wonder because for a middle-of-the-week escape there were quite a few people. Everyone was tying to get a nature makeover and Sequoia National Park was the place to make that happen.
We still enjoyed ourselves, masks and all. It was good to escape the city and make it all the way to the sequoias. Something about being in that giant tree forest helped me forget about all the excess, even if it was for a brief moment.
I was in it, I was present and I felt that reset button hitting itself. I was even more grateful that it happened for the kids too.
I was grateful I could give them the escape and views that helped rejuvenate their spirits. Being restricted by Covid has minimized our summer adventures but I was so appreciative for this one. Glad we got to see General Sherman and all of his awesome giantness. It was definitely worth the drive.
My jar of awesome got another note and our family spirit got that boost we needed before school started. Hoping you find yours …
Sometimes the week’s or day’s events harden you a little bit more and even with a weary heart you go on and you find the softness in moments where you can find them, the kind that take you back and you can see yourself in the mirror again.
Sometimes it’s life during a pandemic, sometimes it happens even if the pandemic didn’t exist. Jobs you don’t like, moments you have to endure, or toxic people that still try to poison your well with their words or actions
Bit by bit, pieces chipped away and all you’re trying to do is get them back.
But you find moments of strength that help you endure. The ocean serves as a great salvation, as do morning hugs and laughter from my kids, early morning runs, or punching sessions with the MuayThai gloves. Laughter because of a good comedian makes you feeeeeeeeel yourself again. The smile that you saw in pictures way back, makes an appearance and a sigh of relief fills your chest.
But when I can’t get any of that and I’m feeling off, I put on the playlist. Sometimes it’s the slower tunes with deeper lyrics that get me to turn the corner.
They build.
And that helps reconstruct some of the pieces in you that felt broken. Zac Brown Band is always a go-to for me and never lets me down, with all the albums I own, he gets his feel good tunes any time of day. And the Brothers Osborne have that deep soothing voice and cool melody, I fell for this song and it caught my heart. Love the build. I flashed back to Los Angeles Azuuuuuuuuuules because they jam with other artists to make better sounds. My Blue-Eyed souls, the ones that bring it every time, my Hall & Oates, whose concert rocked epically, always get me with this song. And it’s a sad song, but it makes me feel better. Makes me feel. Just the sound of their voices. Bob Dylan’s son with his Wallflowers, when I hear this tune I need to stop and let it sink in. That opening and that vibe they got going, it reverberates and changes my frequency.
And that’s what needed.
These songs make me feel something different. Sometimes it’s a time machine sending me back to a moment or place that made me smile or feel good, sometimes it’s the they-probably-wrote-this-for-me reflection, and sometimes it’s the wishing part of the song, the one in the pocket between the chords, after the bridge that makes you feel connected.
I was in the midst of all that and it helped me breathe a little deeper. Feel-good vibes tingling my heart and building the part of me that’s important. Growing.
Some already began their journey, but we had a little time left before our clock started.
No more morning runs, bike rides, tennis matches or Sandlot games. I’m going to miss it. It’s back to the Ticonderoga No.2 pencil and binders, or in this case computers.
Made me think of my school days and the tunes that I hear take me back to those Levi Jeans and Aquanet hairspray days before that 7:45 am bell. My Kevin Arnold days. Hoping the kids remember the songs they hear and it takes them back. Great music lasts. Especially 70s and 80s tunes being heard in 2020. Well there whole lives, really. It leads to good memories. Good moments. Good times. No matter what age.
Even with Back to School creeping up on us it looks a little different this time around. But there’s one page that exists in this Silver Linings Playbook, we’ve spent even more time together. And that’s a lot of dance sessions, mixed tape running jams, and feel-good morning songs. And although some days it seems like the clock is slowly ticking away, and I see the gray hairs growing in my tired lion’s mane, we manage to find some moments of gratitude so that the sands of time feel different.
Trying to make things lighter as the heaviness of this pandemic hits us in different ways.
And their annual summer ice cream for dinner extravaganza made the smiles last a little longer as the sprinkles and Chocolate Magic Shell syrup made appearances. Drizzles everywhere. They look forward to this treat every year. And with these times, why not hit the 2.0 version. Banana split it.
This was one of their moments of gratitude, they slowed down. They closed their eyes and took it in. Rocky Road rocks, especially with an epic playlist.
In general the kids smile, laugh, and feel loved. But the goodnight hugs that night were extra squishy.
Still under lock down stay-at-home orders it’s the one thing that I’m looking forward to …
SHARK WEEK!
Andy Casagrande.
Do you know him?
He’s the man. There are so many biologist and camera people that bring us the awesomeness and beauty of sharks. And we’re all excited to catch what’s gonna happen next week.
Shark Week is my jam. I nerd out and feel like George Costanza, that I too can become a marine biologist. With limited beach access it’s the one open-water thrill that makes me feel closer to the ocean and protecting the life that lives in it.
I’m looking forward to Sharkadelic Summer and Mako Nation. My son is a bigger fan than my daughter, but we all cozy up on the couch and watch. We learn something new every time and it’s been a good family tradition. As long as I can remember we watch this week-long event together, shark cupcakes and all.
The week has got me feeling all the great vibes and in honor of these warm smiley emotions I got my beach mixed tape playing all week. When you’re driving to the market and you hear that beat drop … mannnnnnn!
That irritability hides somewhere else in the background because it can’t share the same space as this music. The feeling dissolves and the smile happens. Just like that, you feel good and the frustrations of the day are on pause. Lightness of being is on play.
These tunes coming out my radio frequency and I imagine heading up PCH to feel the warm sand between my toes, and a bit a fresh air … far away from everyone and everything.
Those butterflies I feel in my heart, it’s the nervousness and anxiety of starting something new. It’s about the fear of failing, the what-the-hell-happens-if-this-is-sucks feeling, the what if this never gets made feeling? It’s part of the dreamer’s disease. Side effects when you’re chasing stars and gravity’s got a hold on you.
Even in a pandemic these feelings still exist.
But because of the very pandemic, these feelings won’t stop me. They’ll make events and stepping stones a lot more challenging, but not impossible. It’s the vision you gotta keep, the vision and your motivation.
Projects become something to look forward to for everyone, whether it’s planting a garden, learning a new instrument, crocheting a blanket, starting a weight-loss program, a 30-Day Challenge, or writing a new story. Getting jazzed up about it is the first step and I’ve been on fire for a bit, now I get on with the research and storytelling.
I set the goal and I’ve been inching my way, step by step on the broken yellow-brick road. I’m still a ways away, but I do something every day to contribute to the success of this project. Whether I’m researching content online, writing notes, writing story, editing as I go along, getting pictures and notes to help me stay motivated. Every hour helps. Every day. Carve out an appointment with myself to get it done. I’m still worried about not knowing certain technical aspects for the story, but research continues. I’ve even added a side hustle to help me financially. I’m trying to remember, it’s just a way of making it happen.
And just when I hit a bump of discouraging news this week, I thought man, this is gonna suck, don’t know if I got it. Will I get it? I heard the tunes that got me out of some jams. Sitting in my car wondering … and the tunes come out. I hear the funk, the guitar, and those lyrics jumpstart something in me, the dancing begins and the boost in my confidence. They introduce a different mindset. A positive one. Sitting on the couch thinking, and a feel good song from my childhood occurs to me and it makes me strut, that George Jefferson confidence strut. Makes me feel like I got this! I’m on the flip side. It’s possible. Even if it’s just today, today is the day I need confidence. I’ll deal with tomorrow, tomorrow.
And here I am, continuing that train of thought sending the tunes out in the universe hoping it encourages someone else out there to strut their stuff.
The Wish Factor 