Flawsome … Pass It On

28 Dec

 

It’s not like I wake up asking for it, just comes with the territory of a dysfunctional family, and for the most part I can Zen my way through it. But sometimes it just hits you late at night and there’s nothing left waiting for you in morning … nothing but an emotional hangover.

That crap can just suck the sunshine out of the sunrise.

It can be a look, a word, a telephone call or a full blown passive aggressive conversation … the results the same. Just a bunch of doubt, questioning what you thought was right, what you believed of yourself, what you knew to be true. You play the possibilities over and over in your head, all the things you could have said and should have said.

Conversations with yourself at 2 a.m. are freaking great, you have the best comebacks and rational of all time … and sometimes they end up being the worst. You end up reaching for your phone, knowing full well you shouldn’t, because you know things are just gonna get worse but you need to get your point across.

And just as you reach for the phone, you see a text that a friend sent you over six hours ago, something you missed, because you were having deep thoughts with yourself over the championship one liner that could have zinged your way into a ‘you-see-what-I’m-saying-you-see-my-point’ victory.

And it read …

FLAWSOME

adjective

An individual who embraces their flaws and knows they’re awesome regardless.

 

And then Holy Crap.

It hits you.

It’s a sign.

A small bright black and white sign in Times Roman font that proves something you’ve known all along, proves your entire point.

You are awesome.

You are and the people in your circle of trust, whether it’s family or friends, need to have that word in their vocabulary and apply it to you, because you apply it to you.

She sent it to me and I thought … yes. She gets me. This whole group of chicks get me. Now I may not have the typical broad spectrum kind of flaws that 40-year chicks have, everyone is different I get it. But I do have some, and I’ve gotten to the point where I know what they are and I embrace them, they’re part of my DNA. Do I love them? No. But I know they’re a part of me and I work on them, Deepak and meditation seem to be helping out. Acceptance is something that comes along the road, some people take longer than others. But I’ve arrived to the station, I’ve been here a long time. I’ve been thinking I’m awesome for a while now, clumsiness, dorkiness TV-loving nerd and all, and those closest to me should think it too.

So when I got the text … I felt vindicated, because someone else, someone on the other side of town was thinking exactly what I was thinking and passing it on.

Yup.

I’m Flawsome and I have friends that know it and feel it too.

So I stopped having the conversation with myself, closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and fell asleep. I could finally do that, because I knew again what I had already known.

.

.

 

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10 Responses to “Flawsome … Pass It On”

  1. bgddyjim December 29, 2015 at 1:10 AM #

    Ah, but flaws flawsome is redundant. Flaws are just as much a part of living as breathing is. Flaws are understood and accepted by everyone. All awesome people are flawsome.

    This, by the way, is to say you are, not that you aren’t. I’m simply, humbly, offering you permission to settle for just plain awesome. Just don’t tell anyone. 😉

    • The Guat December 29, 2015 at 10:07 AM #

      Yeah flaws are what make you awesome, but some people don’t see it that way and they turn things around on you and make you feel bad … You start to have doubt, but then a friend sends you this text and you’re like yes! I knew that. I knew I was awesome all along 🙂 thanks for hanging out 🙂

  2. susielindau December 29, 2015 at 7:00 AM #

    This gave me shivers! We are Flawsome sisters of the blog. Ha!

    • The Guat December 29, 2015 at 10:11 AM #

      Flawsome sisters of the Blog that sounds great! I’m getting all kinds of Flawsome vibes from you Wild Rider all the time. This community is pretty Flawsome friendly 🙂 hope you had a great Christmas:)

      • susielindau December 29, 2015 at 2:08 PM #

        I sure did! I hope you have a lot less sleepless nights in 2016!

  3. Apple Pie & Napalm December 29, 2015 at 9:01 PM #

    I seriously need to move away from hot mess and into flawsome. I think I need an upgrade. Flawsome sounds like something I need to work toward in the new year. I think you totally rock, keep up the amazing job here!

    • The Guat December 30, 2015 at 9:32 AM #

      Thanks so much buddy. Feeling the Flawsome and definitely passing it on as I forgot I was rocking it before this encounter. All it takes is a little reminder to set you straight. Hope Flawsome right cvs your 2016 state of mind 🙂

  4. Cayman Thorn December 30, 2015 at 7:44 PM #

    I don’t have to be a chica to get you.

    Ain’t no such thing as perfect, outside of a random baseball game and sunsets maybe. But you’re so much more than that, mija. You’re genuine and you’re bold and you are talented as all get out. The writing is stronger than ever, sister.

    Peace, Deepak and Pozole

    • The Guat December 30, 2015 at 9:07 PM #

      Thanks buddy you’re always spreading the kindness and boosting my confidence. Love my writing buddies 🙂 and that title Peace, Deepak, and Pozole DUDE! That one was awesome! Ahhhh wish I would have thought of it…maybe that will be my New Year’s Post. Hope you have a great New Year’s buddy. Buen Camino!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Flawsomeness and Juice | The Wish Factor - December 31, 2015

    […] been reminded that I’m Flawsome, and that there’s Big Magic out there for daydreamers that take action, and don’t give […]

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