Tag Archives: depression

Shark Week And Little Miracles

5 Aug

This weekend I had one of those the door-slammed-shut-so-look-out-the-window life experiences.

Let me tell you … those suck.

Now normally these frustrating learning experiences revolve around my career or struggle for it. But for some reason life decided to expand its parameters and take a shot at me on a personal level too. It knocked me out in the twelfth round. But no worries … I’m a brown belt, right? Only two belts away from being considered a black belt, a lethal weapon, so I figured I could dig deep inside and find something to pull me out.

But the thing about these check-the-window-because-the-door-is-closed experiences is that not only do they make you sad, they make you upset too. You’re a whole ball of emotions and you’re trying to think rationally, but that never works. You don’t have ration when crises take place. You always need to take a breath. So during my breathing moment I remembered the awesome, wise words of Jax Teller from Sons of Anarchy.

“…That which doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. I don’t believe that. I think  the things that try to kill you make you angry and sad. Strength comes from the  good things – your family, your friends, the satisfaction of hard work. Those  are the things that’ll keep you whole. Those are the things to hold on to when  you’re broken.”

Yeah he was right. I was angry and sad at the same time, not a good combination to be walking around with in public. These kind of emotions should be held in private over a couple of pints of Ben &Jerry’s. But with two kids, the daylight hours don’t give you the time to drown your sorrows in chocolate. So I grabbed hold of Jax’s words and headed to the beach with my kids in hopes that sand castles and the Pacific Ocean would help me out.

Normally I’m not one that looks for little signs, but that day I was grasping at anything to be grateful for … anything that would help me flip the switch.

Getting green lights all the way to the highway … nice.

No traffic all the way to the beach … even better.

Kids not yelling in the car over who got the better superhero book … sweet.

Hitting the radio stations and finding uplifting dance songs or country tunes on every station … awesome.

Finding the very last parking space in a full lot … priceless.

The journey to the Pacific Ocean appeared to be working its magic, because usually when I’m trying to feel better something happens. Something, followed by something else that usually creates an avalanche-type of situation where one little thing builds on another and soon profanity seems like the only answer.

But not today. Today small miracles were working in my favor.

However you always have your little setbacks. And just as the plastic shovels and buckets hit the sand those thoughts began creeping in … you know those picky kind that try to suck out the good time that you are currently having at the moment. The kind that creep up on you after a phone call or random comment from a stranger, some Debbie Downer moment you worked so hard to avoid. Little setbacks, but then this is when it happened. This is when I saw it.

Now normally I would have thought this sighting to be ironic considering I was at the beach, but instead I just found it as a sign, another little miracle thrown my way. A funny one.

shark-week-2013

Image via DiscoveryChannel

As I was attempting to build the smallest sandcastle in history, my son pointed up to the sky and I saw it. A small plane dragging a banner across a sky.

SHARK WEEK BEGINS TODAY.

Dude. I couldn’t believe it. I shook my head and laughed. Yeah Shark Week. I had forgotten about Shark Week and my mantra … “Live every week like it’s shark week.” Even the crappy ones. Just find a moment a Shark-Week moment to get you through.

So I dropped the shovels, grabbed the kids, the boogie board, and headed toward the water. Nothing like a Shark Week banner to inspire you to get into open waters. Well to be fair we just stuck around the shore. I always remembered the Rogue Sharks episode describing man-eating sharks, no need to get too inspired and head deep into the ocean. The shore proved to be just fine.

Happy Shark Week everyone.

 

This is my first Yeah Write challenge, go ahead and visit to see other writers.

 

Life Smacked Me, But It’s O.K. … I’m Pacing Myself

23 Jul

“We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.” —  Carlos Castaneda

 

My light bulb moment right there. The weird thing was I saw the quote while exiting a parking lot. There I was stuck in the heat waiting my turn to leave the bank and I saw the sign. Sometimes it’s the most random places where a life lesson smacks you in the face.

I wasn’t even prepared for it, but there it was, and I was happy for the reminder. Sometimes with all the drama going on, you wonder when you’re going to get a good day. But then you get this wisdom thrown at you and it alters your perspective. Even in a bank parking lot.

It keeps you in check … The universe  is conspiring to teach you something, so I was trying to listen.

Being emotionally drained takes a lot of recovery on your part and a lot of chocolate. So why not change all that recovery process and spin it into positive effort — proactive energy — that makes your life stronger and better.

Image via Colourbox.com

Being miserable sucks. Depression sucks. Having periods of malaise sucks. I’ve had them all. Most of the time these things are under your control, but when they’re not … that’s when it becomes difficult, frustrating and infuriating. But life, miserable or not, keeps going and so should you.

The quote reminded me of my Happiness Project and I was thankful I created one. I was thankful I was taking steps to change my Guat existence. I was thankful I came across Rubin’s book. I guess the universe was reassuring me that I was on the right path. I might not be seeing instant Mary Poppins results, but I’m pacing myself. Slow and steady …