Dear Jax,
I can’t even …I mean I can’t.
This is definitely a Holy Crap moment.
I can’t believe it’s here. I just can’t. I mean part of me is in denial about the whole thing. I know it’s real I know it’s gonna happen and I know I’m gonna have a difficult time letting go.
But I’ve got to … there’s just no other way
You have been in my life for seven years. It’s been seven years … seven … and now things are coming to an end and I don’t know how to deal with it. I’m excited about what’s to come, but feeling the anxiety of knowing it’s the end.
I’m riding an emotional roller coaster on a Harley.
I’m in midst of mourning the loss of this relationship and coming to the realization that you will no longer be in my life on a weekly basis.
I feel like all the good men in my life have left me.
I didn’t know what to do without Tony. I knew I’d miss Tommy. I mean I was at a loss with Jack. Devastated with losing Jesse and Walter. And now it’s you … I have to say good-bye to you. I knew you’d be a heart breaker the moment I saw you.
You were the dangerous, charming and gentle-hearted type of outlaw.
I knew you were walking the line, but I still fell for you. Your heart was in a good place, you were suffering from the hero’s complex, always trying to do right, but being pulled in all kinds of directions so the wrong eventually surfaced. I’m gonna miss being in your life, hearing your thoughts, and riding this final journey with you.
Some of the best parts of being on this final ride with you were listening to the deepest thoughts from the most complicated part of your soul, reading your father’s letters and manuscript, watching your relationship with Tara, seeing your brotherhood with Opie and Chibs get stronger, realizing that we both liked and hated your crazy mother, and rooting for you to succeed as a family man … but most of all it was the drama. The intense blow-my-mind-I-need-a-defibrillator-because-my-heart-couldn’t-take-it-anymore kind of drama pulled me in every week. You pulled me in …
Your story Jax.
It was your story that drew me in and for that I suppose I have to thank the genius behind you Kurt Sutter.
But now it ends.
Tomorrow is the BIG day. Tomorrow at 10 o’clock on FX Network I will be anxiously and nervously awaiting the end of your story … the end of my beloved Sons of Anarchy A.K.A. SAMCRO. I am happy to see how it will end, but saddened to realize that it has an end.
Tomorrow there will no longer be Teller Tuesdays … just Tuesdays. Brace yourselves, I know I’ll have to because I can guarantee you that it will feel empty and it will suck, that’s the feeling of knowing you won’t be there. That’s how it’s gonna feel.
Am I being a little dramatic?
No, not really. Not if you’re a fan like me.
I was glad to have known you. You’ve kept me company every Tuesday night for the past seven years.
Teller Tuesdays … they’ve been an awesome ride.
The Wish Factor 
I’m sure you’ll miss Jax, and truth be told, he’ll likely miss you too. My only question is if you hit the “publish” button once, why did your post show up in my reader 7 times?
Holy Crap! I have no idea! I don’t think that’s ever happened before duuuuuuuude so sorry for clogging up your reader with all those man candy photos of my hunky outlaw. I did press just once…don’t know what happened.