Archive | 10:59 PM

It Broke My Heart … And I Forgot to Check My Crazy at The Door

11 Dec

HOLY CRAP!

The night was filled with profanity and disbelief. The unexpected happened, but in retrospect I should’ve known he was going to rip my heart out.

There I was six years ago minding my own business, when a friend calls me and says you should really watch this new show. I’m totally into it. They’re doing a marathon on account of the season finale.

And there it was … that’s where it began. I blame Michelle for this state I’m in. She turned me into a Sons of Anarchy junkie, where apparently no one is ever safe in the city of Charming.

Image via  Fxnetworks.com/soa

Image via FXNetworks.com/soa

It’s been six years and I can’t stop the surprises from blowing my mind.

Usually I can see things coming, but this totally broke my heart and left me in my I-can’t-believe-this-just-happened state of mind. I couldn’t even sleep thinking about it.

He killed her. He totally killed her off and he broke my heart in the process.

In one of the best season finales I’ve seen, Son’s of Anarchy creator Kurt Sutter kills off Doctor Tara Knowles: Jax Teller‘s wife, his old lady, the love of his life, the mother of his two kids, and the moral compass to his being.

 FXNetworks.com/soa

Image via FXNetworks.com/soa

Who does that? Who kills off someone so important to the main character?

Who leaves two little boys alone with the possibility of a junkie ex-girlfriend or murdering grandma vying for guardianship?

Who?

Who makes you believe that Jax will own up and protect his family at all costs, only to be betrayed by his own mother?

Who?

Sutter.

You bastard.

I used to think he was a writing genius, but now I think he’s just a crazy madman toying with my emotions and breaking my heart at the end of every season. First it was Opie, Jax’s best friend and right-hand man, who was literally beaten to death in front of his eyes. I thought dude … did that just happen? How the hell is Jax going to recover from that? It took me a while to mourn that loss. And now this?

Dude I am heavily wrapped in Sons of Anarchy drama. Complete geek.  Although, I don’t even know if I can say geek when referring to an outlaw motorcycle club show, but in essence, that’s who I am … I’ve turned into one of those Star Trek Super Crazed Fans that know the Spock language and is completely obsessed with the Enterprise. That’s me … however instead of polyester space suits and pointy ears my obsession revolves around motorcycles, black leather, and murder.

There have only been a few shows that get me to a state of craziness like this … LOST, 24, The X-Files, Breaking Bad, The Sopranos. They consume me and  I get so emotionally involved that if I saw one the actors out in the open I would totally jaywalk across congested life-and-death traffic and scale a 20-foot fence just to say how much I love them, but I’d do my best not to come off stalker like.

Realistically it doesn’t make sense for me to get all crazy hostile over Tara’s unexpected departure, but I loved this character. She was a strong woman with flaws and depth. I loved watching her and Jax on-screen.

Poor Tara, she was trying to do the right thing and ended up getting stabbed to death by Jax’s manipulative and controlling mother, Gemma, who escapes without Jax knowing. But of course Tara had to die, she knew all the secrets, including the fact that Gemma also had a hand in killing Jax’s real father, John.  However at least she got to speak her truth about their relationship and Jax spoke his, and they reconnected. At least Jax stepped up and chose her over the club, something I thought would not happen.

“You’re a husband … and a father … and a man before all of this. Own your place.”

Image via FXNetworks.com/SOA

Image via FXNetworks.com/SOA

And Jax did. He did. He listened to prosecutor Patterson. And I was left hopeful … but I should have known. Hope gets shot in Charming.

I was left stunned. In the end, Jax was left finding Tara’s body on the kitchen floor, next to the dead sheriff who was trying to protect her.

Dude I don’t know if I can handle much more, Sutter.

Can I see Karma catching up to Gemma in Season 7?

Dude.

Can I?

Can I see Jax fulfill Tara’s wishes and get his family out of Charming and away from crazy Gemma?

Image via FXNetworks.com/SOA

Image via FXNetworks.com/SOA

Can I?

Considering that Opie’s wife was also killed because of SOA Club drama, can I see Jax’s fate or path being different from Opie’s?

Can I?

You’re killing me, Sutter. Killing me.

For six seasons I’ve been loyal, totally sucked into this biker world with plenty of Holy-Crap moments. However, this one tops the list. I mean if I had a support system, maybe I wouldn’t have been so devastated. But there I was, freaking out on the couch, by myself with no Sons of Anarchy after-the-show-I’ll-comfort-you-this-actually-didn’t-happen group. Just me and some chocolate.

And the show’s message boards.

Yeah … it got so crazy that I went online to the social media world I dislike so much and hit the message boards.

Has that ever happened to you? Where you’re a normal person but turned into a crazed fan?

Yeah that’s what broken hearts do. We forget to check our crazy at the door.