You’re M.I.A.

21 Nov

Dear Perspective,

It seems that you’re missing. You’ve escaped me during my rage and apparently you’re needed.

A recent conversation has driven me over the edge and beyond the help of chocolate.

Yeah. I’m not having any Zen moments right now, I’m having red. I’m seeing red. I’m in red. Where do you go, anyway? Do you not know the importance of your presence? You help avoid the inner-dialogue conversations that lead to the self-help section at the Barnes & Noble.

Dude.

Has someone ever said something to you that sparked a fire? Not so much the-I’m-going-to-get-off-my-ass fire, because you’ve already been off your ass and battling in the trenches. But a I-think-I-might-snap-right-now-and-jump-across-this-table-and-end-up-inspiring-an-episode-of-law-and-order kind of fire.

Yeah … those can be disastrous.

Sometimes people go too far and they know they’ve gone too far, but they don’t reel it in, they keep going because they’ve hit the point of no return. They said something and it’s already out there, already infecting my brain and creating feelings. As a chick, I remember stuff like that.

Perspective … I don’t know how to get you back. You’re M.I.A. Sleep is probably best for recovery mode. I hear that a lot. Drinking might not be the best idea because that may lead to drinking and dialing where circular logic runs rampant.

So now all I can think of is revenge. Not a I’m-going-to-get-you-back revenge, not I’m-going-to-say-something-hurtful-to-you type of revenge, but the I’m-gonna-make-you-eat-your-words type of revenge … a you’ll-regret-it type of revenge … a-I-should-have-never-said-that-to-her type of revenge … the I-made-it-in-spite-of-you type of revenge.

In Spanish … The Lero-Lero type of revenge.

In 80s … The Ha-Moded! type of revenge.

I can’t find you perspective so I’m all for that suggestion right now. It’s fueling me. If you come out of seclusion, maybe you could advise.

Signed,

The Guat.

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12 Responses to “You’re M.I.A.”

  1. TBM November 22, 2013 at 3:15 AM #

    Oh no. I don’t know what happened, but I wish I could show up with some ice cream and we could talk it out. Take care, TG. I’m pulling for you.

    • The Guat December 3, 2013 at 10:53 PM #

      Thanks for your support. The ice cream would have totally rocked. I just had a real bad couple of days and I’m bouncing back. Thank you my friend 🙂

  2. lameadventures November 22, 2013 at 5:02 AM #

    At least you can vent on your blog, Guat, however cryptically. Maybe you and TBM should eat ice cream over Skype.

    • TBM November 22, 2013 at 5:17 AM #

      LOL. We need your sense of humor!

    • The Guat December 3, 2013 at 11:02 PM #

      Thanks for your humor. Yeah I try to get it all out don’t want to air all my dirty laundry, just the main ideas. I’m sure everyone can relate. But thanks for stopping by to brighten my day. Laughter always helps.

  3. bgddyjim November 22, 2013 at 5:38 AM #

    Ah yes. Thank you for reminding me of why I walk away and collect myself BEFORE I hit that zone you’re talking about.

    Speaking from experience, the best way I know to get over it is to get down in the mud and feel that anger, smear it all over myself… Get UGLY in it. Eventually I grow bored and let it go.

    Now I don’t go over the line anymore. Nobody is worth that. Great post.

    • The Guat December 3, 2013 at 11:04 PM #

      Yeah I was swimming in it for a while before I could get perspective. That’s just something you have to do, even when you don’t want to or can’t believe you have to. Thanks for your kind words and advice. 🙂

  4. brickhousechick November 22, 2013 at 12:32 PM #

    GOOD NEWS! I found “Perspective” here, in my home, hanging out by my bed, clinging to my pillow ensuring that I see her and listen to her when I go to sleep at night! She took some of my M&M’s without asking but I forgive her. Her work here is done (for now) so I am sending her right over, Guat! You hang on, she is on her way!!! Be on the look out and get her some M&Ms (the pretzel ones are her faves). xo

    • The Guat December 3, 2013 at 11:08 PM #

      Thanks for sending her over here. That crazy chic was missing and I really could have used her. Thanks for sending her over STAT. Much appreciated.

  5. Andrea Kelly November 23, 2013 at 6:59 PM #

    Ooooh yeah, I know the type of seeing-red you speak of, my friend. And I’ve been seeing a lot of it, myself lately, as well. All I can say is, sometimes that kind of anger, sometimes that need to get revenge and prove them wrong…well, that can be just the fuel you need to start another fire and hit that home run. You can do this! (Also, I have no idea what you’re talking about, but I’m on your side, and whoever said whatever it is they said to you, is a total ass!)

    • The Guat December 3, 2013 at 11:11 PM #

      Yes! Yes. You totally get me. I was swimming in a bunch of feelings and now I’m fueling for a homerun. Hoping I can turn it around. Thanks for stopping by and giving me some cheer.

      • Andrea Kelly December 5, 2013 at 4:09 PM #

        I hope it turns around soon, too! And of course, glad to do it, my friend 🙂

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